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Home & Object Permanence

What to do: Store condiments in the crisper drawers, and put fresh produce in the door and on the main shelves.

Why it works: You’ll hunt for ketchup when you need it, but you’ll forget spinach exists if it’s hidden in a drawer. Keeping perishables at eye level reduces food waste.

What to do: “Didn’t Organize, Only Moved.” Instead of organizing every item while cleaning, sweep all the random clutter into a designated basket to clear surfaces instantly.

Why it works: It clears the visual chaos in seconds. Crucial: you must schedule a time to sort the box, or it becomes a black hole.

What to do: Take the doors off cupboards or closets you use most (or swap them for glass).

Why it works: It combats object permanence — if you can see your dishes, pasta, and clothes, you’re far more likely to use them and keep them organized.

What to do: Stop folding. Use a bin system — one for tops, one for bottoms, one for socks — and throw clean clothes straight into the bins.

Why it works: Folding is a high-effort, low-reward task. Removing it makes the whole laundry process about 50% easier to finish.

What to do: Keep items exactly where you use them, not where they “belong.” Toothpaste in every bathroom, scissors in every room, trash bags in the bottom of the trash can.

Why it works: It removes the friction of walking to another room for a tool — which is exactly where distraction strikes and things get abandoned.

What to do: During a depressive or burnout episode, switch to paper plates and plastic utensils. It’s a tool, not forever.

Why it works: It’s an accessibility accommodation. Prioritizing your mental health over “doing dishes” breaks the cycle of shame and mess. Survival mode is valid.

A note from me

I was diagnosed with ADHD five years ago. Its unmasking brought with it many life-altering manifestations, some of which were incredibly difficult to navigate.

The hardest blow was losing my lifelong passion for reading. The focus and stillness were simply gone. Wanting to better understand what was happening to me, I turned to audiobooks.

I spent many of the hours I was out on the road while out working, listening to book after book, until things slowly began to make sense.

ADHD reframed my entire past, but understanding it has allowed me to take back control of my present and future.

Somewhere in the darkest part of it — the isolation, the not-knowing — I wrote five words down for myself: love me, love my ADHD. It started as something I needed to believe. It became the reason this whole thing exists. It's why you're reading this on a site called lovemelovemyadhd.com.

If you're suffering, help is out there. I hope you find some of it here.

What this is

This guide is everything I wish someone had put in my hands on day one.

It is not the recycled advice you've heard a hundred times — just use a planner, have you tried trying harder. That advice never worked, because it was never built for a brain like ours. This is the real version: why your brain does the thing, and what to actually do about it. No willpower required. No shame attached.